Congratulations to the MHS Band for receiving a “Superior with Distinction” rating at State Performance Assessment. The Distinction rating is only awarded to bands receiving superior ratings from all judges, so this is a major accomplishment. Congratulations!!


SEXTING
Why It May Be More of a Problem Than You Realize…

Definition of Sexting – The act in engaging in sexual activity via cell phone or computer, includes the exchange of nude photographs and videos.

While sexting might seem like innocent flirtation to some teens, the nude pictures and explicit messages they send could become grounds for a criminal record and prison time. For teens, the consequences of sexting are the same for adults in most states, but could also prevent students from receiving college scholarships and job offers. This is not to mention the emotional consequences of having your nude photograph floating around the Internet.

Alabama State Law says that “sexting can result in possible charges of creating, possessing and distributing child pornography.” This is a felony. In the U.S., it is against the law to possess lewd photographs or minors.

Today’s teens and “tweens” are connected to one another, and to the world, via digital technology more than any previous generation. Recent data suggests that social media venues like Facebook and MySpace have surpassed e-mail as the preferred method of communication in all age groups. While today’s tweens and teens may be more digitally savvy than their parents, their lack of maturity and life experience can quickly get them into trouble with these new social venues. For this reason, it is imperative that parents talk with their children of all ages about social media and monitor their online use to help them navigate this new online social world. How parents talk with their kids and teens will vary slightly by age depending on the topic being discussed. These tips will help you start that journey with your family:

Learn about these technologies first hand. There is simply no better way than to have a profile yourself. It will also enable you to “friend” your kids and monitor them online. However, we aware of your child having a “dummy account.” Many parents require there kids to provide them with their passwords so they can check emails and other social media accounts. Many kids have a “dummy account” to share with their parents, and a personal account that their parents don’t know about.

Let them know that their use of technology is something that you want and need to know about. Ask them daily if they’ve used the Internet that day. Ask them what they wrote on Facebook or in chat. Teens and tweens are more likely to be texting. Ask them daily what they texted and what they received. Of course, they’re not going to be specific with you and that’s okay. But it does let them know that you are paying attention.

Keep the computer in a public part of your home. This cannot be stressed enough! This allows you to check what your kids are doing online and to monitor how much time they spend on the Internet. Kids are much less likely to take part in inappropriate activities online if they know a parent or other family member could appear at any time.
Emphasize that everything sent over the Internet or a cell phone can be shared with the entire world, so it is important that they use good judgment when sending messages and pictures and set privacy settings on social media appropriately. Discuss with your kids exactly what “good judgment” means and the consequences of poor judgment, ranging from minor punishment to possible legal action in the case of sexting or bullying. Make a point of discouraging your kids from gossiping, spreading rumors, bullying or damaging someone’s reputation using texting or other tools.

In some cases, it may be necessary to consider formal monitoring systems to track your child’s email, chat, IM and image content. Parental controls on your computer or from your Internet service provider (ISP), Google Desktop or commercial programs are all alternatives.
Set time limits for Internet and cell phone use. Learn the warning signs of trouble: skipping activities, meals and homework for social media; weight loss or gain; a drop in grades. If these issues are occurring due to your child being online when they should be eating, sleeping or participating in school or social activities, your child may have a problem with Internet addiction. Contact your pediatrician for advice if any of these issues are occurring.

Talk to your kids!! Ask them if they know what sexting is. After you learn what your child thinks it is, add in an age-appropriate response to clarify exactly what it is and exactly what the consequences are.


Here are some articles you can access online:

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=7337547&page=1

http://www.digtriad.com/news/investigative/2wtk/article.aspx?storyid=120910&catid=19

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/nationworld/2008845324_sexting12.html

How to Help Your Child Navigate this Age-Old Territory

If you have a preteen or young teen, no doubt you’ve already heard from them about who’s “going out,” along with other terms to describe crushes on someone of the opposite sex. Right now, it’s likely more platonic affection than true love—and middle school crushes aren’t known to last long! But things will be different as they get older, so parents should begin laying the groundwork now to help their young teen learn how to form healthy relationships in the future. Parents need to take their children’s crushes and the hurt and disappointment that sometimes go along with them seriously. In other words, don’t make fun of them, don’t dismiss it—and really listen tot hem. This can really keep the lines of communication open throughout the teen years. Even though it seems that your advice may be falling on deaf ears, love, openness and communication will come through.

Girls tend to start earlier to have crushes, to the point where some parents worry that their daughter is thinking of nothing else. Parents of boys worry about more aggressive girls and their sons’ early interest, experts say. In the case of crushes, both sexes are looking for acceptance in these short-lived relationships. Boys tend to want to be admired; girls are more likely to need to be loved. So when a girl gets “asked out”—which usually means sitting together on the bus but little else—she feels good about herself.

Parents can help build self-esteem early in life by encouraging and setting goals that the child can realistically reach. Give positive feedback and correct the negative in the context of more positive words. Without that early foundation, girls in particular can be so desperate for affection that they just might accept abuse. Parents need to remember their own adolescence and be open for discussion on a variety of topics. In adolescent, friendships can take on a whole new meaning and it is normal for them to start feeling more self-conscious about their appearance. Complicating the issue is that adolescents sometimes value more superficial attributes more than deeper ones. For example, a girl might value appearance or status at first, but later as she matures, she might value fidelity and ability to support a family.

Even with the ups and downs of a crush, it should be fun and make both children feel good about themselves. If not, parents should watch for any pattern that shows a child is tolerating abusive behavior or is miserable—and help him or her realize that it is not the norm for healthy friendships or relationships. Children should also be careful when they are no longer interested and want to “break up”—to remember the golden rule and treat the person as they would like to be treated.

The adolescent and early teen years are tough. Children need to know that home is where they feel safe; a place where they can talk about anything and that you will be there to listen. It’s critical that they are able to trust you. Listen to them, and reassure them that it will okay. The best way for parents to show appropriate relationships and how to treat others is to be clear about their attitudes and values and to be good role models themselves. You’ll teach your children much more about appropriate love and affection for another person if you show them how to treat someone rather than just tell them.

Excerpts taken from Lori Pruitt’s article in www.birminghamparent.com

ANGER MANAGEMENT
Shouting, screaming, fighting, throwing punches—how often does this happen in the lives of your children and their friends? If you ask kids, the answer is a lot more often than you might think. There are all sorts of things that can make kids angry (being cut in line, being pushed, being called a name, being teased, etc.). Sometimes these things lead to fighting. In fact, in a survey of kids 9 to 13 years old, 30% say they get angry at someone their age every day. A quarter of those children end up in a fight with kids punching each other. That behavior surprises their parents.

“So many times I’ll hear parents say, ‘I have no idea where that comes from; I have no idea what happened there.’ Well, the reality is that if they would stop for a minute, they would find that some of their own behaviors are a reflection, on a different level, of what they’re seeing their child doing,” says Sherry Blake, Ph.D., psychologist.

What’s the best way for parents to help kids handle anger? Show them, says Blake. “They see your behavior. If your behavior is one where you’ll stop and try to work things out using techniques other than aggression, then they learn that’s the way to do it,” she says.

Blake says there’s another lesson that parents can teach kids: the way to defuse anger is to know why you’re angry in the first place. “Stop and talk to the child; let’s look at what is really going on internally because many times people hold anger until it just overflows.” What’s more, she says, kids can learn how to control themselves.

Tips for Parents
-The American Psychological Association says that anger is a completely normal, usually healthy, human emotion. But when it gets out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to violent outcomes at home and at school. In fact, many teens today have a difficult time keeping their anger under control.

-Anger creates physical changes that both teens and parents need to recognize—the heart rate goes up, blood pressure rises and adrenaline levels start to soar. Once these changes occur, coupled with thoughts that fuel anger, the emotion can either be helpful or hurtful. Provena Mercy Center cites the following warning signs indicating that your teen’s anger is unhealthy: a frequent loss of temper at the slightest provocation; isolation from family and friends; damage to one’s body or property; a need to exact revenge on others; decreased involvement in social activity.

-Teens often require specific strategies to help them cope with their anger. Share with your teen the following tips to try the next time he or she beings to lose his or her temper: listen to music; write it down in any form (journal, poetry, etc.); draw it; play a sport or work it out; meditate or practice breathing; talk about your feelings with someone you trust; distract yourself so you can get your mind past what’s bugging you.

What Can You Do?
If you believe your teen has a problem with anger, it is your job to help him or her develop positive conflict resolution techniques. The University of Michigan Health System (UMHS) says that teaching children strategies for dealing with their anger is particularly difficult because it can be hard to know when your child will get angry again. As much as possible, use the time between angry outbursts to discuss and practice how to deal with anger. The UMHS outlines the following components of teaching your child anger management:

1. Practice a substitute behavior. Some ideas include counting or visualizing a picture in your mind that makes you feel peaceful.

2. Reward. Sit down with your child and figure out some rewards that he or she can earn by practicing the exercises (on a daily basis) and when he or she uses the exercises when frustrated or angry. Don’t skip the rewards—they are essential to the success of anger management in children.

3. Give examples. Try to think of times when you deal effectively with your own stress and point these out, very briefly, to your child. Also, share your coping strategy with your child to give an example of how he or she could deal with a similar situation. It is also important that your child see you successfully deal with your own anger.

4. Encourage using the exercises. When your child starts to get upset, briefly encourage him or her to practice the substitute behavior. Only prompt your child once. Do not continue to bother him or her about using the exercises.

5. Avoid arguments and discipline consistently. Avoid arguing with your child. Everybody loses when a confrontation occurs. You need to set a good example and deal with your child in a quiet, matter-of-fact manner.

Parents who teach anger management strategies and encourage non-aggressive conflict resolution techniques early on may find the teenage years less challenging. If your child has long-lasting feelings of anger or is unable to adopt coping strategies, seek medical assistance and treatment (U.S. Department of Education).

http://www.connectwithkids.com/tipsheet/2007/354_oct10/thisweek/071010_anger.shtml

PARENT ALERT: “Sexting”
A survey released by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy revealed that about one in five teens say they’ve electronically sent a nude or seminude picture of themselves. Parents are urged to warn children about the dangers of “sexting”—the growing trend for young people to send provocative images of themselves to their friends via mobile phones.

What is “Sexting”?
“Sexting” is a relatively new term coined in this age of electronic communication, which refers to people sending provocative photos of themselves (or others) via text messaging on cell phones. Some have called it “high tech flirting,” but when children or teens are the subject of the photos the consequences can be very severe and last a lifetime. In March, 2009, 18-year-old Jesse Logan took her own life after a nude picture was passed around by email.

Why It Matters
In a technological world where anything can be copied, sent, posted and seen by huge audiences, there is no such thing as being able to control images. Even if a photo was taken and sent as a token of love, the intention doesn’t matter—the technology makes it possible for everyone to see your child’s most intimate self. And in the hands of teenagers, when revealing photos are made public the subject almost always becomes the object of ridicule and name calling. Furthermore, sending sexual images to minors is against the law, and some states have begun prosecuting kids for child pornography or felony obscenity. In January, 2009, three Pennsylvania girls, ages 14 and 15, were charged after they sent nude self portraits to their boyfriends, ages 16 and 17. The boys were also charged.

Kids Should Consider This:
It’s Illegal: Don’t take or send nude or sexually suggestive photos of yourself or anyone else. If you do, you could be charged with producing or distributing child pornography. You could be charged with possession. If they go to someone in another state (and that happens easily), it is a federal felony.

Psychological Consequences: Emotional (and reputation) damage can come from having intimate photos of yourself go to a friend who can become an ex-friend and send it to everyone you know. Not only can they be sent around, they can be distributed and archived online for people to search forever.

Advice for Parents
*Don’t wait for an incident to happen to your child or your child’s friend before you talk to your children about the consequences of sexting.
*Remind them that once an image is sent, it can never be retrieved—and they will lose control of it.
*Talk about pressures to send revealing photos. Let teens know that you understand that they can be pushed or dared into sending something. Tell them that no matter how big the social pressure is, the potential social humiliation will be hundreds of times worse!
*The buck stops with them. If someone sends them a photo, have them delete it immediately.
*Remind children to think before they act.
*Tell children that sending or possessing child pornography is illegal.
*Parents should learn how to use and monitor their children’s mobile phones.
*Parents should check photo galleries on their children’s Facebook and MySpace accounts.
*Give your children clear rules on what they can and can’t do with their mobile phone.

The easy availability of new technologies and social networking sites can turn what can seem like an innocent joke or flirtatious fun into a potentially devastating experience, with young girls most at risk.

**22% of teen girls and 20% of teen boys have sent nude or semi-nude photos of themselves.

**22% of teens admit that technology makes them personally more forward and aggressive.

**38% say exchanging sexy content makes dating or hooking up with others more likely.

**Revealing photos can be resent to a vast audience.

**Sending a sexual image to a minor, even if you are a minor, is illegal.

**Once the image is out there, it will ALWAYS be out there.

**The psychological trauma experienced by a child whose photo has been forwarded to others can last a lifetime.

SUICIDE PREVENTION

September is Suicide Prevention Month. Teen suicide is becoming more common every year in the U.S. In fact, only car accidents and murders kill more people between the ages of 15 and 24, making suicide the third leading cause of death in teens overall in children ages 10 to 19 years old. As many as 8% of adolescents will attempt suicide today. Completed suicides have increased by 300% over the last 30 years. Girls make more attempts at suicide, but boys complete suicide four to five times as often as girls. Thinking about suicide, or feeling helpless and hopeless about how to solve life’s problems, are signs that a teen may be at risk and in need of help and support. Beyond thoughts of suicide, actually making a plan or carrying out a suicide attempt is even more serious.

What makes some teens begin to think about suicide—and even worse, to plan or do something with the intention of ending their own lives? One of the biggest factors is depression. Suicide attempts are usually made when a person is seriously depressed or upset. A teen who is feeling suicidal may see no other way out of problems, no other escape from emotional pain, or no other way to communicate their desperate unhappiness.

Depression
Untreated depression is the number one cause of suicide among teens. Children can experience depression at any age, even shortly after birth. In very young children, depression can manifest in a number of ways, including failure to thrive, disrupted attachments to others, developmental delays, social withdrawal, separation anxiety, sleeping and eating problems, and dangerous behaviors. In general, depression affects a person’s physical, cognitive, emotional and motivational well-being, no matter their age. Teens with depression may exhibit fatigue, difficulty with school work, apathy and/or lack of motivation. He or she may be over-sleeping, socially isolated, acting out in self-destructive ways and/or have a sense of hopelessness. Teens who are considered at high risk for depression disorders include:
■children referred to a mental health provider for school problems;
■children with medical problems;
■gay and lesbian adolescents;
■incarcerated adolescents;
■pregnant adolescents;
■and children with a family history of depression.

Other Risk Factors
In addition to depression, there are other emotional conditions that can put teens at greater risk for suicide. For example, teens with conduct disorder (a repetitive and persistent pattern of behavior in which the basic rights of others or major age-appropriate societal norms or rules are violated) are at higher risk. These teens tend to have problems with aggression and may be more likely to act out impulsively.

Substance abuse problems also put teens at risk for suicidal thinking and behavior. Alcohol and some drugs have depressive effects on the brain. Misuse of these substances can bring on serious depression, especially in teens already prone to depression. Besides depressive effects, alcohol and drugs alter a person’s judgment. They interfere with the ability to assess risk, make good choices, and think of solutions to problems. Many suicide attempts occur when a teen is under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Teens with substance abuse problems often have serious depression or intense life stresses, too, further increasing their risk.

Being a teen is not easy for anyone. There are many new social, academic, and personal pressures. And for teens who have additional problems to deal with, life can feel even more difficult. Teens who have been a part of domestic violence or witness domestic violence are at risk. Some teens are struggling with concerns about sexuality and relationships, wondering if their feelings and attractions are normal, if they will be loved and accepted, or if their changing bodies are developing normally. Others struggle with body image and eating problems. Some teens have learning problems or attention problems that make it hard for them to succeed in school. They may feel disappointment in others. All of these things can affect mood and cause some people to feel depressed or to turn to alcohol or drugs for a false sense of soothing. Without the necessary coping skills or support, these social stresses can increase the risk of serious depression and, therefore, suicidal ideas and behavior. Teens who have had a recent loss or crisis or who had a family member who committed suicide may be especially vulnerable to suicidal thinking and behavior themselves.

Warning Signs
Many times there are warning signs that someone is seriously depressed and may be thinking about or planning a suicide attempt:
■trouble concentrating or thinking clearly;
■changes in eating or sleeping habits;
■major changes in appearance;
■talk about feeling hopeless or feeling guilty;
■talk about suicide;
■talk about death;
■talk about “going away”;
■self-destructive behavior;
■no desire to take part in favorite activities;
■giving away favorite possessions;
■suddenly very happy and cheerful moods after being depressed or sad for a long time (this may indicate that a person has decided to attempt suicide and feels relieved to have found a “solution.”)

www.healthyplace.com

If it seems like your child repeatedly comes down with colds despite your best efforts, you’re probably right. The fact is, kids are more susceptible to cold viruses than adults for the simple reason that they have not yet developed the immunity to fight them. With over 200 viruses that cause colds, the typical child will suffer from several colds per year. Since there is no known cure for the common cold, prevention is the best defense. Here are simple steps that can help keep your child healthy:

Stop the spread. The viruses that cause colds are spread by airborne droplets. A cough or sneeze left uncovered can contaminate nearby people or objects. It’s a good idea to teach your child to grab a tissue when a cough or sneeze is coming. If that isn’t possible, the US Center for Disease Control (CDC) now recommends coughing or sneezing into your upper sleeve rather than your hand. Remind your children if they touch their eyes, nose or mouth they should wash their hands. Keeping hands germ-free can dramatically reduce the spread of the virus.
Keep it clean. The best defense against viruses is still good hand washing. That means vigorously rubbing your hands together using soap and warm water for 15-20 seconds. The Mayo Clinic suggests teaching your child to sing a song like “Row, Row, Row Your Boat” or “Happy Birthday” to ensure adequate washing time. You may also consider carrying a bottle of hand sanitizer with you when possible. Just make sure it contains at least 60% alcohol and that children rub their hands together until the gel is completely dry. Make sure that small children are supervised when using hand sanitizer, as children may be poisoned from licking or eating it.
Don’t share. It may be contrary to everything your child has been taught, but this is one instance where sharing isn’t a good idea. Certainly do not allow your child to share his drink, even with family members. Also make them aware that sharing pens and pencils in the classroom can spread germs.

Keep it loose. Humidifiers put moisture in the air, preventing dryness of the mouth, nose and throat. They can also help loosen secretions and decrease congestion. You might consider placing a cool mist humidifier in your child’s room when she becomes congested.
Get moving. Moderate exercise is a good idea for the whole family. When it’s cold outside, it’s easy to curl up at home and do nothing. While colds can strike at any time, the risk of contamination is greater during the winter when we are confined to smaller indoor areas. Viruses also tend to thrive in the drier, winter environments. Web MD recommends regular aerobic exercise to help increase the body’s natural virus-killing cells.

Eat yogurt. The healthy bacteria in yogurt can help to boost the immune system and stave of illnesses. Eating a serving of yogurt several days a week may decrease your child’s chances of becoming ill.

Think healthy. With work, school and a full activity calendar, it’s hard to maintain a healthy lifestyle. Sometimes a few small steps are all it takes to decrease your child’s risk of illness. Encourage a well-balanced diet by keeping your refrigerator stocked with healthy fruits and veggies. Also, encourage kids to drink plenty of fluids in the winter months to help loosen congestion and stay hydrated. Finally, don’t underestimate the power of a good night’s sleep.www.birminghamparent.com

Known as the silent killer, carbon monoxide results in numerous accidental deaths each year. As the weather cools, heaters are turned on and fireplaces are lit, and it’s important to remember the safety of our children. If you are moving or remodeling, it can be an even bigger concern. Children are far more susceptible to carbon monoxide poisoning than adults because a child requires more oxygen and uses it faster than adults, according to the Consumer Products Safety Commission. Additional dangers are posed for children because a child’s central nervous system is not fully developed. The end result is that the child’s nervous system is much more susceptible to the toxic exposure of carbon monoxide poisoning. Approximately 24 children a year die from carbon monoxide poisoning, with an additional 3,500 reports injuries requiring a visit to the emergency room. Carbon monoxide can cause severe learning disability, memory loss and personality changes in children. Below are some helpful tips for keeping your family safe:

●Install carbon monoxide detectors in all sleeping rooms, and within 15 feet from a heat source (this is the most likely source of carbon monoxide release).
●Buy hardware detectors if possible—those that can be plugged into the wall. Virtually all direct current detectors have a battery backup in case of a power outage.
●If batteries are needed, check them once a year. Choose a date to test or replace the batteries, like a holiday or birthday, so you won’t forget.
●Only purchase carbon monoxide detectors that have been approved by the United Laboratories (UL).

Excerpts taken from Don Keenan article in www.birminghamparent.com

Set a Good Example. Parents who value education have children who value education. Encourage your child to attend school daily and refer to it as a “job.” Don’t allow your child to miss school unless he is actually ill or there is an emergency. Teach responsibility by living it. Take your commitments seriously. Your kids are watching!

Encourage Good Study Habits. Parents can teach their children good study skills starting with organization. Start by cleaning out the backpack weekly. Have your kids write down all of their assignments in their planner and check it over daily. Encouraging students to have long-term goals and to keep up with their reading assignments pays off.

Set Boundaries. Let your kids know your expectations of their grades and behavior. Set realistic rules and consequences such as bedtimes and curfews. Don’t threaten or promise something that can’t be carried out.

Know Your Children. Discover their talents and interests. Encourage positive, productive extracurricular activities such as sports, music, dance or hobbies. Know how your kids are spending their time when they are not with you.

www.birminghamparent.com

Tests can be stressful even for the most prepared students, and, unfortunately, test anxiety can actually have a negative impact on your performance. Well, fear not: the following test anxiety busters can help you get through your next test with much greater ease—and likely more success!

First, identify why you are feeling anxious…

Did you prepare or study efficiently?
Are your family expectations or personal expectations more of a source of distress rather than encouragement?
Are you over-extending yourself? Are you involved in too many activities?
Are your expectations realistic?
Are you studying daily or just right before a test?
Study for the test, but if you find yourself becoming confused, unable to concentrate or unable to absorb the material, take a break. Try taking a walk in the fresh air or a “power nap.” Space out your studying over a few days or weeks and continually review class material. Don’t try to learn everything the night before. Remember that studying the material you are to be tested on is by far the most effective way to combat test anxiety.

Study Smarter
Being organized with your studies can help you keep from pulling all-nighters to get all of your studying in and blowing the test because you’re exhausted (see above). How do you study ‘smarter’? Make a list of the most important things you need to learn, in order of importance, and hit the items at the top of the list first. (That way, if you run out of time, you’re mostly covered.) Make a list of all the work you have to do, estimate how much time each item will take, and compare that with the amount of hours you have available; this will tell you if you can carefully read (or just skim), how many times you can afford to revise papers, and other ways to pace yourself so you can get everything done. Oh, and turn off the TV until your tests are behind you.

Get Enough Sleep
Getting 6 hours of less can put you into what’s called a sleep deficit, or lack of sufficient sleep. Having a sleep deficiency can actually make you less sharp mentally, which can negatively affect your performance on tests, even if you spent those missed hours of sleep studying. So it’s very important for you to get all of your studying done so you can get a good night of sleep before your big day.

Visualize Success
A great way to build your confidence as you fall asleep each night is to visualize yourself taking the tests and doing wonderfully. Detailed visualizations can help you feel like you’re really experiencing something, and visualizing yourself doing well is a way to ‘practice’ success in a way that can actually help you perform better. (Being confident as you take your exams can keep you from choking because of the stress.) Visualizations can also help you to remember facts: you can create detailed scenarios that involve the information you’re trying to remember, and this can help cement the facts in your memory.

Eat Before the Test
Not only does your body require proper nourishment to function as it should, so does your brain! Avoid caffeine and other stimulants, as these only increase feelings of anxiety.

Taking the Test
Read the directions slowly and carefully. If you do not understand the directions, ask your teacher. Skim through the test so that you have a good idea about how to pace yourself. Write down important formulas, facts, definitions and/or keywords in the margin first so you don’t worry about forgetting them. Do the simple questions first to help you build your confidence for the harder questions. Don’t worry about how fast other people finish their test; just concentrate on your own test.

Stay Calm
Because stress can impair your memory, it’s important to stay calm before and during tests. While that’s easier said than done, there are several stress relief techniques that can help you calm down quickly whenever you feel overwhelmed. For example, breathing exercises have been shown by research to reduce test anxiety, and can be extremely effective in helping you relax and reverse your stress response in a variety of situations: just take deep breaths, expanding your belly on the inhale, and let the stress come out with your exhales.

Keep the Situation in Perspective
Remember that, no matter how important the test is, it will not be the end of the world if you do not do as well on it as you would like. Just do your best. You can’t do more than that.

There’s a fine line between supporting your child and fighting his battles. Here’s how to know when to save the day…and when to save your breath.

When your children are small, you’re obliged to be a hovering mama bird. But when it’s time to leave the nest, your sweet chicks will need to test their wings, especially one they start school, and with that comes the inevitable conflicts and hurt feelings. In some cases, gentle interventions might smooth things out. But handling every difficulty your child faces could keep him from developing self-confidence.

Situation #1. You feel that your child has an unreasonable amount of homework.

Should you butt in? Not until you’ve done some serious reconnaissance work. Make sure your child is legitimately spending time working, not playing with the dog or daydreaming. If that’s not the case, make an appointment with the teacher.

How to handle it: Come prepared. Before the meeting, keep track of your child’s progress. Set goals for your child to complete an assignment, then assess at the end of that time. Write down specific challenges. The more you can show that you’ve tried to deal with the issue at home, the more receptive a teacher will be to your concerns.

When to reconsider: If your help in organizing tasks seems to speed things up and ease stress, the answer may be structure, not a teacher conference.

Situation #2. Another adult lectures your child.

Should you butt in? If the conversation is an attempt to keep your child safe, let the other adult finish.

How to handle it: Be present and reinforce what the other adult was saying so your child understands it’s not okay with you either. Stopping others from disciplining your child lets him think he can behave badly when out of your sight.

When to reconsider: If the other adult is speaking to your child more strongly than is necessary, you can politely cut him off. Introduce yourself as the parent, then say that you’ll take it from there.

Situation #3. Your child doesn’t get invited to a big birthday party.

Should you butt in? No. Making an issue about the slight will probably make things worse and draw attention to the fact that your child was left out.

How to handle it: Instead, focus on comforting your child and planning something fun as a diversion on the big day. Down the road, if this happens more than once, consider enrolling your child in a class or program outside of school. He’ll meet a new group of kids who share his interests.

When to reconsider: You may want to talk to the teacher—not the other child’s parent—to make sure there’s not a larger issue between your child and the birthday boy. Ask if there is some tension between this child and yours. If you find out that your child did do something mean, use this opportunity to show how his actions affect others—and himself!

Situation #4. Another kid is bullying your child.

Should you butt in? Not immediately, unless your child’s safety is at stake. If you’re there, watch closely and give your child a chance to solve the problem on his own. The same goes for school: It’s better to equip your child with skills to stay safe and empower her to resolve the situation on her own.

How to handle it: Rehearse ways for your child to respond appropriately.

When to reconsider: If the bullying persists and your child feels threatened, get involved. If you are the one intervening, nonchalantly pull your child out of the situation (snack time before discussing it. Talking to her in front of the bully could be more embarrassing. If the bullying is at school, ask a teacher to keep an eye out.

Situation #5. A teacher gave your child a C, but he thinks he deserved an A.

Should you butt in? Intervene only if your child will take part in the conversation with the teacher. If you believe your child’s points are valid, say you’ll make an appointment with the teacher but that he’ll have to make the case.

How to handle it: Have your child ask the teacher why she gave him the grade she did. Hearing the feedback from the teacher will help him fine-tune future assignments. Helping your child line up his arguments beforehand is a great way to teach him how to constructively approach a disagreement.

When to reconsider: If your child is prone to misreading or incorrectly copying down instructions, make sure you have the whole story before you jump to conclusions. A stellar report on blue whales is less so if the task was to write about smaller mammals of the sea.

Excerpts taken from Real Simple Family.

If you would like to be added to the MJHS Counseling & Guidance Newsletter, please send an email with your child's name included to kristia.callaway@sccboe.org


What is the MJHS Counseling and Guidance Department?
The Counseling & Guidance Department in our school is available to help students, parents, and teachers develop positive learning experiences. The program consists of a variety of services and activities, including individual and group counseling, parent and teacher consultation, group guidance, information services, referral assistance to other programs and services in the community, and student assessment.

The school counselor is responsible for developing, scheduling, and evaluating services of the program. Primary services of the school counselor are to provide direct assistance to the students in the school. For this reason, a major portion of the counselor’s day consists of services for students. Parent and teacher consultations are usually scheduled in the early morning before classes or during after-school hours.

The counselor is a master’s level professional with preparation in human development, learning theory, counseling and consulting, tests and measurement, career development, research, and other areas appropriate to the practice of counseling in a school. The counselor’s office is located in the school across from the main office, and appointments can be scheduled by calling (205) 640-2040 or emailing kristia.callaway@sccboe.org.



MJHS Counseling and Guidance Mission Statement
Every student has the right to experience respect and dignity as a human being and to benefit from the counseling and guidance services.

Every student has the right to participate in activities that promote self-direction and self-development.

Every student has the right to make choices and accept responsibility for choices made.

Every student has the right to participate in a comprehensive school counseling and guidance program designed to assist all students in attaining their maximum potential in academic, career, and personal and social development.


School Nurse
Students must see the school nurse before they are allowed to call home to be checked out. If the student does not have a fever or other visible signs of illness, he/she will not be allowed to call home. In order to prevent the spread of illness to other children and teachers, Nurse Owen asks that you keep your child home from school if he/she exhibits any of the following symptoms:

*Fever of 100.5 or higher. Children should stay home until they have been without fever for 24 hours.
*Nausea or vomiting within the last 12 hours.
*Severe headache.
*Red, watery eyes with yellow drainage.
*Unexplained rash.

If, under exceptional circumstances, a child is required to take oral medication during school hours, and the parent/guardian cannot come to school to administer the medication, only the school nurse or medication assistant is able to administer medication in compliance with the following rules:

1. All medication (prescription or non-prescription) to be given at school requires written authorization of the parent/guardian. Medication forms may be found at http://www.stclaircountyschools.net/forms/medical/medication_at_school.pdf.
Each medication and each change in medication requires a new form.

2. School personnel are not allowed to keep bulk medications or take phone requests from parents/guardians. Only medications brought to school by a parent/guardian can be given. The student is not allowed to bring the medication.

3. All medication must be brought to school in original containers with a complete pharmacy label and/or manufacture’s label and an additional label with a child’s name and dosage instructions. The medication form for over-the-counter medicine must be specific as to what the medicine is for.

4. Each prescription medication must be signed by the physician and must be brought to school by a parent/guardian and given to the school nurse or medication assistant. The physician signed form must accompany the prescription medication. Any medicine brought to school without the form signed by the physician will not be given.

5. If a child has a medical condition that requires medication to be administered under emergency conditions such as asthma, allergies, diabetes, high blood pressure, etc., the parent/guardian must provide the medication along with a Medication Consent Form signed by the physician.

If you have any questions or concerns about the above information, please contact Nurse Owen at 640-2044 or at Sharon.Owen@sccboe.org.


Teacher Conferences
During the school year, if you find you need to conference with one of your child’s teachers, please arrange this by calling the front office (640-2040) or by emailing the teacher (email addresses may be found on our webpage). If you find you need to conference with more than one, I will set up a group conference for you.


*Character Education
Character Education for the month of August will be “New Beginnings.”


*Calendar for the 2009-2010 Scholastic Year
August 10 ~ First day for students
September 7 ~ Labor Day, school closed
October 22 ~ Parenting Night, 4-7pm
October 26 ~ Weather Day
November 11 ~ Veteran’s Day, school closed
November 25-27 ~ Thanksgiving Holiday, school closed
December 21-January 6 ~ Winter Holiday, school closed
January 18 ~ MLK Day, school closed
February 15 ~ President’s Day, school closed
March 14-March 21 ~ New York City Trip
March 22-26 ~ Spring Break, school closed
April 30 ~ Weather Day
May 24 ~ Last day for students


The Alabama Direct Assessment of Writing (ADAW) for 7th graders will be administered on February 18.

The Stanford Achievement Test (SAT), the Alabama Reading and Mathematics Test (ARMT) and the Alabama Science Assessment (ASA) will be administered over a 2-week time period beginning on March 31 and ending on April 8.


**PLEASE DO NOT SCHEDULE FAMILY VACATIONS OR ROUTINE DOCTOR’S VISITS DURING TEST TIMES!*



**All email addresses may be found on the Moody Jr. High School Website at http://www.moodyjrhigh.com/**



The Starfish
There was a young man walking down a deserted beach just before dawn. In the distance he saw a frail old man. As he approached the old man, he saw him picking up stranded starfish and throwing them back into the sea. The young man gazed in wonder as the old man again and again threw the small starfish from the sand to the water. He asked him, “Why do you spend so much energy doing what seems to be a waste of time?” The old man explained that the stranded starfish would die if left in the morning sun. “But there must be thousands of beaches and millions of starfish,” exclaimed the young man, “How can your effort make any difference?” The old man looked down at the small starfish in his hand and as he threw it to safety in the sea said, “It makes a difference to this one.”



Have a great year and let me know how I can make a difference for you!

Choosing a college can be one of the most important and exciting decisions in a teenager’s life. It can also be one of the most stressful. Knowing how and when to help your teen and when to step back can make the search more fruitful—and fun—for everyone. It is definitely a bit early to be making final college and career choices with your jr. high school student, but it is never too early to start being prepared.

Exploring Careers, Majors and Colleges
Does your teen know what career fields he’d like to explore? With possible majors in mind, College Board’s online “College Matchmaker” (http://collegesearch.collegeboard.com/search/adv_typeofschool.jsp) can help teens find colleges offering those majors. They can plug in additional criteria, like desired college size and location, extracurricular offerings and other desirable features, then get a list of matching colleges, with details on costs, application process and admission requirements. The College Board website lets students compare up to three selected schools side-by-side and provides a tool for teens to see how they stack up to the admission requirements for any school. In this exploration phase, parents can best support teens by being open-minded and encouraging them to consider many possible schools. Talk to your child about your own college experiences, including both the good and bad decisions you may have made.

Considering College Costs
Parents should talk money with their teens, including how many college visits and applications you’ll pay for, how travel expenses would be covered if the teen chooses a far-away college, how much money parents can or will contribute toward college expenses and whether that financial contribution hinges on the student maintaining certain grades. Parents should also discuss what portion of college expenses they expect their teen to contribute, whether through work income, loans or scholarships. Obviously, scholarships would be the ideal starting point, as that money doesn’t have to be paid back. FastWeb offers a comprehensive scholarship search engine and is a great starting point for locating scholarships. Students should check with their high school counselor as well for local, regional and state scholarships. During sophomore, junior and first half of their senior year, students will prepare for, schedule and take the PSAT, SAT, SAT II, ACT and AP exams. If a student scores well on the PSAT, they may be eligible for the National Merit Scholarship program. Students who score well on AP exams may be able to obtain college credits for their knowledge in a subject area. Many high schools now allow students to earn college credits through Advanced Placement (AP) courses, dual enrollment and International Baccalaureate (IB) programs. These opportunities could save a substantial amount of money and give your student a head start, regardless of which colleges they decide to pursue.

Visiting Colleges Timeline
Freshman Year
During the summer before Freshman year, have your teen make a list of interesting colleges that offer a variety of majors, not just the major he/she thinks he/she might choose. Note high school requirements for college admission and use these requirements to make goals for your child’s high school career.

Sophomore Year
With a list of interesting colleges in hand, your teen can visit each school’s website to get a sense of the atmosphere, facilities and programs available. They also can meet with college recruiters, either through recruiter visits to their high school or through regional college fairs. The counseling office at your teen’s high school can provide information on regional fairs. These events give parents and students an opportunity to get initial impressions of many colleges at once.

Junior Year
It’s time to tour campuses…have your teen take a camera and notebook along on each campus visit. Suggest that they make notes during and right after each visit about their overall impressions, what they liked or didn’t like, and additional information they want to gather about the school. Their photos and notes will become invaluable later when trying to decide where to apply. Parents should also offer their own observations, but in a low-pressure way.

Senior Year
Students should enter their senior year with a list of four to eight colleges to which they plan to apply. Start with those that seem like the best match, in terms of admission requirements, overall “feel” and fit with your teen’s preferences. Then, add a couple of “reach” schools (those that might be a bit of a stretch for admission), and at least one “safety school” (schools whose admission requirements your teen easily meets). All should be schools your teen would feel good about attending, if accepted.

Submitting Applications
Each college has its own application procedures and deadlines. Many now accept applications online, but will have different deadlines for “early decision,” “early action” and regular applications. Search College Board’s website for “early” for an article explaining pros and cons of applying early. Typically, early applications are due in November of the student’s senior year, and regular applications are due by January 1. Your teen should review application requirements very carefully and follow them exactly. Parents can help their teens by developing a checklist, organizing their documents, and creating a calendar of all deadlines, including financial aid and scholarship application deadlines. The MyOrganizer tool and College Application Checklist on the College Board site can help. However, it is important that parents do not micromanage their teen during the application process. Instead, set reasonable deadlines for completion, especially if you’re paying the application fees. If the student is not responsible enough to do what is expected, then he or she is not ready for college.

Making the Big Decision
Most colleges notify students by April 1st whether or not they’ve been accepted, wait-listed or not accepted. Students typically have a month to respond to acceptances and financial aid packages. In the ideal world, the student will have several acceptances to choose from. The most important factor in deciding which college to choose is the student’s level of comfort. Does the student feel good about the college? Does it feel right? For some students, this will be an easy, gut-level decision. For others, they may like different things about each college, and have trouble making up their mind. Suggesting that they make a list of the pros and cons of each option may help. Again, parents should avoid pushing for their own favorite, but could highlight differences between the colleges that their teen might want to consider in making the final decision.

Excerpts taken from Melanie Snyder article in www.birminghamparent.com

LICENSE TO DRIVE:
A Parent’s Primer on Making Driving Safe

Teen driving is among the most dreaded parenting passages. It has been laughingly credited with gray hairs, sleepless nights and even premature dementia. But although parents may be warned about the worries of their teen’s new-found driving independence, they don’t hear as much about its prerequisite—the learner’s permit and license. For those who came of age 20 or more years ago, both seemed automatic. But it’s not so easy now. A significant percentage of first-time applicants come unprepared for all that testing entails. Lieutenant Tommy Laird, the Birmingham Driver License District Commander, offers this advice on what parents need to know:

For a Learner’s Permit
►An applicant must be at least 15 years old. He must present his original birth certificate (no copies), Social Security card, school enrollment or last report card and $5.
►A parent’s approval is not required. Another driver can bring the teen.
►The student should carefully read the study book, available at license offices, beforehand. Or they can go to the web site at www.dps.alabama.gov. This written test is more difficult than many think. There is no driving test for permits.

For a Driver’s License
►The applicant must be at least 16 years old and have had his permit for at least six months.
►A parent or legal guardian must accompany the applicant.
►There is no fee. However, the teen must present his learner’s permit.
►There is no written test. There is a driving test. If it rains (even a sprinkle), all tests are cancelled.
►The test will be done in the parent’s car. Parents must provide proof of vehicle insurance and a valid driver’s license. Examiners will inspect the vehicle for a current tag, working brake lights, functioning turn signals and an operating horn. Drivers should also be familiar with the emergency brake and how to operate it. If any qualification is unmet, the test in cancelled.
►Students may apply for both permit and license at any state office. Road tests are available by appointment or on a first-come basis, depending on which office you choose. The busiest times are the day after a state holiday, all school holidays, spring break week and summers. Most offices open at 8am, though some open at 7am. Call ahead to confirm office hours. Some offices may not be open 5 days per week. Remember that all offices are closed for state holidays.
►Some of the trickier driving challenges are three-point turns and complete stops. Many are unaware that they must stop before right-on-red turns. Others forget the importance of an exact speed limit, even if it is 20 miles per hour. Drivers should be cautioned to follow rules exactly.

What Happens If They Flunk? They aren’t alone! A significant percentage does not pass at first. They may try again the next day, unless the officer notes a dangerous maneuver. Then it could be a 30-day wait before the test can be taken again.

This is meant to be a helpful guide, but some rules/regulations may change. Make sure to visit www.dps.alabama.gov.

Excerpts taken from Jean McLean article in www.birminghamparent.com

IS MY CHILD TOO BUSY?
Finding a Healthy Balance for Parents and Children

When children express interest in joining a sport or activity, parents will try to accommodate their children’s wishes out of love and wanting their child to “grow” as an individual. But is there also pressure from parents to get their child in those activities? Dr. Vivian Friedman, a UAB child and family psychologist, believe most parents feel this responsibility: “Parents compete with other parents; they don’t want their child to ‘fall behind’ in skills. They worry their child won’t make the baseball team or cheerleading squad.”

A 1998 University of Michigan study found a dramatic spike in the amount of time children are spending in organized activities. The study showed children’s free time, the time not spent in school or participating in activities, decreased from 40% in 1981 to 25% in 1998. Also, according to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 78.3% of children had at least one parent working year-round in 2005. Friedman agrees there is a correlation between the number of working parents and children’s increased time spent in activities: “I think that parents who work, whether single or two working parents, have less energy to occupy their children in a creative manner. However, one of the hurdles for parents is to get children in these activities. They want to give their children a competitive advantage.”

While we teach children to strive for excellence and do their best, is there a danger of over-pressuring these young minds to succeed? There certainly is a case for more stress in our children’s daily lives. This is likely due to increased expectations at schools and at play like Little League, performing groups, etc. It is difficult to generalize a stressful schedule because every child is unique in handling stress. Children have different personalities and temperaments, so what is stressful for one child may have little effect on another child.

When scheduling activities, parents need to consider their children’s ages. In general, the younger the child, the less expectation there should be in the activity. Friedman notes that stress in children is most likely a response to change: “Change is constant in life, but children are more vulnerable than adults because they have less control of their worlds and too much stress can affect even the youngest child physically, emotionally and behaviorally in a negative way.”

What are the warning signs a child has become too overloaded with activities? It’s not always easy to recognize stress in children, but there are some noticeable symptoms. Physical stress, a decreased appetite, sleep disturbances or nightmares can be signs. Any physical symptoms without physical illness can be a sign of stress. Children may either directly complain, exhibit irritability due to exhaustion or tell their parents they wish to have time to play.

If children want to join multiple activities, parents can be encouraging but also set boundaries. When mediating activities for your children, it is important to include non-activities like playtime into the scheduling. Consider free time to be an activity too. Schedule it along with other structured things. If your child wants to experiment with different activities, this is a good thing as she needs to learn what she likes and what she is good at. Just set the rule that once you start something, you finish it, meaning that each season or cycle of the activity must be completed, even if she decides she does not like it or is not good at it.

Much of the success of extracurricular activities depends upon a healthy balance for the child and parent. In fact, children’s participation in activities can improve a child’s performance. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, moderate amounts of stress can motivate a child to keep his grades up or participate fully in activities. Successfully managing these situations can enhance a child’s ability to cope with stress in the future.

Get Your Child to Love Reading and Writing Poetry During National Poetry Month

Did you know that April is National Poetry Month? Think you don’t care? Well, you should, and so should your children. Poetry is more than pretty words on paper. It can help improve your child’s reading ability and be a great way for children to connect emotionally with you, themselves and language. It can also be a great form of entertainment. But many kids have no interest in reading poetry, so what can you do to spark your child’s interest (and possibly yours)?

Get Them Reading
Why should children read poetry? How is it different from reading prose? Poetry is great for reluctant readers—lots of white space on the page and fewer words make it much less intimidating. Poetry is condensed and shorter, which can encourage children lacking the patience to read many pages to pick up a book. Instead of paragraphs or chapters, people who read poetry can react to a single word or phrase. It’s a great way to get up close and personal with the sheer joy of language.

Developing a love for language is one of the first steps in getting a child to love to read. This is best achieved by hearing books read aloud. There are no better books to read aloud than rhyming books, such as Dr. Seuss and nursery rhymes. Hearing rhymes and then learning to read them creates a flow of the language and also instills the fun of it. Even silly rhymes are fun and convey that reading is fun. Having nursery rhymes read to you and learning them is directly correlated to higher reading levels at young ages. Some children read poetry and don’t realize they are reading poems. For example, Mother Goose rhymes are poetry and important for children to read. Children are naturally attracted to rhythm and rhyme as they are learning to express themselves.

Get Them Writing
Another way to encourage young minds’ love of poetry is to encourage children to write poetry. Poetry writing can be fun for kids because there are no rules. They can write whatever they want and move outside the conversational box of prose and paragraphs. They don’t have to worry about spelling correctly or punctuation. They can just let their thoughts go.

ARMT / SAT / ASA TESTING

It’s that time of year again...

Your child will be taking the Alabama Reading and Mathematics Test (ARMT) on Wednesday and Thursday, April 1 & 2, and the Stanford Achievement Test (SAT) on Monday through Wednesday, April 6-8. In addition, 7th graders will be taking the Alabama Science Assessment (ASA) on Thursday, April 9.

Standardized tests have been used to measure student achievement and ability for many years. Over the past few years, these tests have become more important than ever. Many states have defined specifically what students should know and be able to do, grade by grade. They use standardized tests to measure how well students achieve these goals.

Why do students have to take all these tests?
Schools have always wanted to know how students are doing. Whether it’s a three-question quiz or a major unit exam, teachers have used tests to measure how well students have learned what they were taught. Standardized tests are designed to give a common measure of how well students are doing. Some of these tests measure how much students have learned about math, reading or science. Others test a student’s ability to learn in school. Tests are one important tool to help you and the school measure how well your child is learning. That’s why it’s important for you as a parent to know all you can about standardized testing.

What are standardized tests?
Standardized tests are created to see how students from one school or class compare to other students across the city, the state or the country. They give educators a common standard to measure student performance. To measure fairly, these tests need to be given under the same conditions. The amount of time students have to finish the test is strictly controlled. Each is scored in the same way. Some tests measure students aptitude–their ability to learn. They test a broad range of skills and abilities that can help students do well in school. Aptitude tests can help teachers plan instruction that is not too hard and not too easy. Other tests measure achievement–how much students have already learned. They can be used to measure whether students have mastered the information presented in their classes.

Testing can help the school:
*Evaluate a school program.
*Report on a student’s progress.
*Diagnose a student’s strengths and weaknesses.
*Help identify a student’s interests and aptitudes.
*Design an instructional program to meet an individual student’s needs.
*Place a student in a class to meet special needs.

Testing can help parents:
*See how their child’s school achievement compares with other students locally and nationwide.
*Learn more about their child’s aptitudes in various areas.
*Learn more about their child’s interests in possible careers.

Testing can help students:
*Better understand their strengths and weaknesses.
*Consider possible options for further education.
*Think about career choices.

Parents have an important role to play in making sure their children do their best. Here are some of the questions you should know about your school’s standardized testing program:
✓When will the tests be given? April 1-2, April 6-9
✓What are the names of the tests? Alabama Reading and Mathematics Test (ARMT), Stanford Achievement Test (SAT) & Alabama Science Assessment (ASA).
✓How will the results be used? All tests are achievement tests, meaning they test what your child has already learned. However, the SAT includes a subsection called the OLSAT which is an ability test, meaning that it will test what your child is able to learn. However, it is not an IQ test.
✓How and when will I get the results? The results of both the ARMT, the SAT and the ASA are usually sent home with the 1st report card during the following school year.
✓What can I do at home to prepare my child? You should be helping your child with his or her homework and to study for regular tests throughout the school year. There is no sense in “cramming” for standardized tests. However, you can make sure that your child gets plenty of sleep during the testing week, eats a healthy breakfast every morning, and wears comfortable clothing to school. Layers are a great idea because they help your child control his or her own temperature. Don’t be too anxious, but let your child know that you have confidence in him or her.

Your child may use a basic 4-function (+, -, x, ⌐) calculator on parts of the tests. You will need to provide your child with this calculator and it must be approved by his or her test administrator. More advanced calculators, such as scientific and graphing calculators, will not be allowed.

Most importantly, make sure your child comes to school on testing days. Attendance and promptness are of extreme importance. Our goal is to have 100% attendance on all testing days...every child counts!

Standardized tests are more common today than ever before. And the stakes have never been higher. These tests are used to measure student achievement and to tell schools which skills students need to improve. And with information gathered from a standardized test, your child’s school can design lessons to raise your child’s academic performance. Results of standardized tests are also used to evaluate a school’s performance. So, it’s important to all involved for every child to do well on tests. You can boost you child’s performance on standardized tests. Following, you will find tips for helping your child feel confident, well-prepared and ready to succeed on these important tests.

Attendance Makes a Difference
Teachers can’t teach students who aren’t in school. And there’s strong evidence that regular school attendance can result in significant test-score gains. So remember:

*Make sure your child is in school every day.
*Don’t schedule medical appointments during school hours.
*Don’t take your child out of school for a family trip or activity.
*Don’t allow your child to be tardy. Have your child get ready the night before so he/she can get to school on time.

Good Health = Good Test Scores
Getting ready for a big exam requires more than just studying. Your child must be physically fit, too. So don’t forget the following as your child prepares for big exams:

*Breakfast. Get your child in the habit of taking time for a nutritious breakfast every day. Even toast and a piece of fruit will provide body and brain energy.
*Sleep. Get your child into a regular sleep routine. Then stick to it! Most children need at least 8 hours of sleep each night.
*Exercise. Encourage your child to exercise every day. Exercise increases oxygen to the brain and helps with thinking and memory.

Read for Success
A child who can read well is more likely to succeed in school and do well on standardized tests. Here are some reading skills that are important for test success and ways you can help at home:

*Comprehension is more than just being able to recognize and pronounce words—it’s about making sense of what the words say. Standardized tests often measure comprehension by asking students to find the main idea. To help your child find the main idea:
-Use the newspaper. Cut out a short article. Then cut off the headline. Ask your child to read the article and write a headline that summarizes the main idea. Compare your child’s headline to the newspaper’s headline.
-Use nonfiction. Nonfiction writing is about real people, places and things. Many standardized tests use nonfiction text for reading comprehension. So ask your librarian to help your child find interesting nonfiction books to read. Then ask your child to tell you the main idea of a paragraph or a chapter from a nonfiction book.

*Reading Rate is the speed at which a child reads. Since most standardized tests are timed, it’s important for your child to have a good reading rate. Just remember, it doesn’t help your child to read faster if your child doesn’t also have good comprehension. Here’s how you can help:
-Schedule reading time every day. Research shows that kids who read every day are more likely to read faster.
-Have your child read silently. Sometimes a child reads slowly because he/she is whispering the words aloud.

*Vocabulary. The more words your child knows, the more likely he/she is to do well on standardized tests. So help your child:
-Learn a new word every day. Find words in the books your child is reading or ask the teacher for a list. Each morning help your child write a new word on a file card. Write the definition on the back. At dinner have family members try using the word in a sentence. At the end of the week, review all the cards.
-Have a “newspaper scavenger hunt.” Ask your child to underline new words in an article. Then look them up together.

Overcome Test Anxiety
Nobody likes to take tests. And some kids get what’s called “text anxiety.” They are so worried about taking the test that they can’t show what they know. Telling your child, “Just relax” won’t work. Instead, share these tips:

*Don’t cram. A good night’s sleep is more important than an extra hour of studying. Studies show that last-minute cramming doesn’t work.
*Reading the directions—carefully!
*Look the test over quickly. Before answering any questions, skim quickly through the test. Figure out how much time to spend on each section.
*Don’t be afraid to skip a question. Don’t waste time worrying about a question you can’t answer. Instead, go on to questions you know. If there’s time, go back to the items you skipped.

Remember past tests where you did well. You can do well again!

Many parents tire of prodding their children to do chores, homework or get ready for school. But it doesn’t have to be that way. Kids who procrastinate can break the habit if parents teach them the skills and self-discipline needed to start and complete tasks.

Whenever you consider a child’s behavior, you must first consider his or her developmental level. You need to make sure that the tasks your child is being asked to do are within his developmental abilities to accomplish. If they are, then you need to look at why your child is procrastinating. Children procrastinate for a variety of reasons: lack of motivation, distractions, disorganization, feeling overwhelmed and fear of failure due to perfectionist tendencies. Once a root cause has been determined, parents can help their child make changes and so break the procrastination habit.

If your child feels overwhelmed with a task, be proactive on the front end. Teach her to break down bigger projects into smaller, more manageable ones. Work out a plan, and if need be write it down. Then check your child’s progress. In this way you are acting as her coach but still holding her accountable for the work.

Another thing that may help is a timer. With young children you can make it into a game (ex. “Let’s see who can pick up the most toys before the timer goes off.”). If your child has a short attention span, start with five minutes or ten minutes. If he’s older, go longer. While the timer is ticking, tell your child to stay focused on that task and not get distracted. Then when the timer goes off, give him a short break and reward (“Good job!” is usually reward enough). If you need to, set the timer again. With older kids, use discretion with a time as it could elicit a power struggle. When setting time limits, give older children some control. For example, if the trash needs to go to the curb, tell your child about it after school but give him until dark to get it outside.

Another way to motivate children to get a job done is to use teachable moments when they are feeling the natural consequences of their procrastination, such as being late for school, having to miss an activity or getting a poor test score. Rather than chastising them at that moment, suggest and encourage use of tactics that could break the habit.

Most importantly, remember that there is no one-size-fits-all technique when it comes to helping children break the procrastination habit. Discuss with your child what method works best for him and allow some trial and error until he settles into a routine. But remember building competency and responsibility takes time, and he may need to learn the skills and self-discipline to do it. If your child doesn’t know how to break down jobs, organize information, or stay on task, teach him. Then, gradually up the level of expectation and let him become more independent while you provide coaching and encouragement. Whatever time you invest now will positively impact every are of your child’s life both now and in the future. The results will be a much richer, fuller life.

The month that has become synonymous with love and chocolate also has been designated as American Heart Month by the American Hear Association. While the candy bars and truffles that crowd store shelves each February are sure to make your loved ones smile, so will healthier alternatives. If you would like to encourage better eating habits for your family this year, consider these fun and heart-healthy options:

Watermelon Hearts
Satisfy the sweet tooth with watermelon’s natural sugar. Mini watermelons are available off-season in many grocery stores. To turn this summer staple into a sweet Valentine’s snack, cut a melon into slices about an inch thick and then use a heart-shaped cookie cutter to make smaller treats. Older children will love the novelty of eating watermelon in February, and the heart shapes will make it something special and amuse loved ones of any age.

“All Shook Up” Smoothie
Can the soda this year. Instead, mix up a fruit smoothie by blending together fruit and ice with milk or yogurt. To create a sweeter taste without the spoonful of sugar, add juice that is labeled “100 percent fruit juice.” Pour the smoothie into a tall milkshake glass and top it with a cherry or slice of strawberry. If you have a true chocoholic at home, dip the cherry or strawberry slice in chocolate; it’s just enough to take the treat from tempting to irresistible!

Fruit Love Pop
Instead of pouring melted chocolate into those heart-shaped lollipop trays, fill them with 100 percent fruit juice and freeze. Add lollipop sticks to create a healthy snack, or leave out the sticks and use the colored ice cubes to cool their drinks throughout the week.

A Heart-y Breakfast
Start their Valentine’s Day off with a bang, in the form of heart-shaped buckwheat pancakes. This alternative to butter pancakes contains higher-quality protein and more calcium and vitamins than bleached white flour. Add an extra shot of love with strawberries and a sprinkle of cinnamon on top. If you’re really feeling the love, include a few drops of pink food coloring.

Bushel of Love
Put a new twist on the old standard by giving a bouquet that looks good enough to eat—and is! Create your fruit bouquet by placing whole strawberries and melon balls onto wood grilling skewers. Limit the fruit to the top half of the skewers, so that the sparse bottoms resemble stems and the fruit tops look like flowers. To add more color and variety to the bushel, use twist ties to attach small bunches of red grapes to the skewers. Make sure the bunches are small and the twist ties wrap snuggly around both the skewer and the grape stems. Fill in empty space by adding real mint leaves sill attached to their stems, or another edible herb that looks like petals. Place the whole creation in a red vase.

A Touch of Chocolate
For true chocoholics, think size. A chocolate bar or small package of four quality chocolates will satisfy their craving and expectation for chocolate, but won’t overwhelm them with the amount of sugar in a large box of assorted candy.

More Resources
Recipes for smoothies, buckwheat pancakes and other healthy alternatives can be found at the following websites:
www.healthy-kid-recipes.com
www.healthy-family.org
www.deliciousdecisions.org
www.juicing-for-health.com
www.allrecipes.com

The Birmingham Civil Rights Institute (328-9696 or www.bcri.org) is one of several areas where black history and civil rights struggles are remembered and the contributions of African-Americans are showcased. There were many turbulent and troubling years and events in the city’s history, yet Birmingham chose to learn from its past, opening the institute in 1992. A stage for telling the story of struggles for civil rights, the institute affirms that new generations will not forget those events. Exhibits recall the arrest of Rosa Parks in 1955 on a Montgomery bus for her refusal to give up her seat to a white man, the U.S. Supreme Court’s bus desegregation ruling in 1956, and James Meredith’s 1962 admission to the University of Mississippi.

Across the street from the Civil Rights Institute, Sixteenth Street Baptist Church (251-9402 or www.cr.nps.gov/nr/travel/civilrights/al11.htm) served as a center for black community life. Designated a National Historic Landmark, the church is best known for a 1963 Sunday morning bombing. Set by Ku Klux Klansmen, the bomb ripped through the side of the church, killing 11-year-old Denise McNair and 14-year-old Carole Robertson, Cynthia Wesley and Addie Mae Collins. Still with an active congregation, the church has a memorial nook with old photographs and a tribute to the girls whose murders brought national attention to Birmingham and the civil rights struggle being staged here. (Tours typically are offered Tuesday through Sunday with limited hours; it is best to call ahead.)

Diagonally across from the church, Kelly Ingram Park is where protesters once gathered for marches and rallies. Poignant statues in the park remember the confrontations that many people associate with Birmingham in the 1960s.

A few blocks south of the park, the Alabama Jazz Hall of Fame Museum (254-2731 or www.jazzhall.com) spotlights jazz greats with Alabama ties.

Within walking distance of the jazz museum, the Eddie Kendrick Memorial Park remembers the Birmingham native who gained fame as the lead singer for the Temptations.

The Alabama Sports Hall of Fame (323-6665 or www.ashof.org) has many African-American athletes among the sports standouts remembered there. Among those are Olympic track star Jesse Owens, boxer Joe Louis and baseball legend Willie Mays.

Through March 1, the Birmingham Museum of Art (254-2565 or www.artsbma.org) will host two exhibits with ties to African-Americans: Fabric of Life: African Textiles and Quilts from the American South and Kente in the Community. During February, the museum plans several programs focusing on black history. Among those are: Art, Gospel and All That Jazz and Fanciful Fabric of Life Family Day.

The Southern Museum of Flight (833-8226 or www.southernmuseumofflight.org) showcases Southern aviation history. Newly added is a display on the Tuskegee Airmen, African-American pilots who trained in Tuskegee during World War II. The group became part of the 332nd Fighter Group which destroyed 111 enemy fighters in the air and another 150 on the ground. The pilot’s accomplishments opened the door for African-Americans, who prior to 1940 were not allowed to fly for the U.S. military.

CAUTION: POWERFUL.
Not recommended for children, pregnant women or people sensitive to caffeine.

That is the CAUTION label found on the side of most energy drinks. Full Throttle, Rock Star, Monster, Red Bull. They sound more like the names of rock bands than energy drinks. The catchy names are catching on with young people, just like the marketing directors for these companies intended. Each can is loaded with caffeine and sugar to provide instant energy.

Both Rock Star and NOS come in 16-ounce cans, which actually contain two servings (It is important to note that most products list the serving sizes in 8-ounces, while their products are actually sold in 16- and 24-ounce sizes.). If your kid drinks the whole can, he or she will be consuming 54 grams of sugar---that’s equal to more than 13 teaspoons of sugar! Cans of Monster energy drink display a warning similar to the one found on alcoholic beverages: “Consume Responsibly - Limit three cans per day.” And yet our children are guzzling this stuff by the gallon.

Did you know that there is a real reason for these warnings? Besides the fact that caffeine is a drug and most of us would not even consider feeding our children 13 teaspoons of straight sugar, energy drinks can (and have actually cause(d) heart problems in children. Energy drinks increase heart rate and blood pressure in everyone, but especially in children since they tend to weigh less than adults. Caffeine in even small doses can cause heart arrhythmia, where the heart beats rapidly or irregularly. Guess what? Energy drinks do not contain caffeine in small doses…they contain it in very large doses! The risk for young athletes is even greater. While kids on the sidelines used to drink water or Gatorade, they are now drinking energy drinks. Athletes lose fluids during practice and competition through sweat and exertion. Add caffeine to the mix and the body is further deprived of fluids. This causes dehydration and it is very dangerous. When athletes do not replenish electrolytes, this can cause heart problems and even, in some rare cases, sudden death.

Other than caffeine and sugar, many energy drinks, depending on their type, also contain the following ingredients:

Bitter Orange has been used to take the place of ephedra, which was removed from stores by the FDA due to its dangerous effects. Bitter orange shares many of the same problems as ephedra. The active components of bitter orange are synephrine and octopamine, which are structurally similar to epinephrine. Orally, bitter orange is used as a treatment for chronic fatigue syndrome and stimulation of heart and circulation. Bitter orange by itself is bad enough for you if it is not prescribed by a doctor to treat a disease. However, it is also possible that bitter orange, when combined with other stimulant products (as in energy drinks), can cause severe cardiovascular adverse effects because of the additive stimulant actions.

Guarana is also known as Brazilian cocoa or zoom. Guarana, like caffeine, stimulates the central nervous system, heart and skeletal muscles and possibly the centers that control blood pressure. It is associated with dehydration, insomnia, nervousness, restlessness, gastric irritation, nausea, vomiting, tremors and anxiety.

Glucose, Sucrose and/or High-Fructose Corn Syrup is found in all energy drinks, except those that are specifically marked as sugar-free. The amount of sugar found in most energy drinks is actually similar to that found in soft drinks and some fruit drinks. However, this amount (60 grams for a 16-ounce drink and 90 grams for a 24-ounce drink) is two to three times the maximum recommended daily intake of sugar (32 grams for every 2,000 calories consumed).

Ginseng, also known as Korean or Asian Ginseng, is promoted to stimulate immune function, improve physical and athletic stamina, enhance overall well-being and increase resistance to environmental stress. However, studies performed to prove this have shown no such conclusions. Instead, these studies can link ginseng to insomnia. Plus, even if ginseng did increase resistance to environmental stress, all of the other ingredients found in energy drinks actually increase stress and anxiety, so it would be counter-productive.

Taurine can cause mild diarrhea and constipation, intense itching, nausea, headache, dizziness and gait disturbances. Fun.

For more information, please refer to the following links:
http://healthytrust.blogspot.com/2008/04/danger-in-energy-drinks.html
http://www.freewebs.com/dangersofenergydrinks/thewarnings.htm

While many children have been working tirelessly to create their perfect gift list for the holiday, many parents have some reasonable concerns about the dangers of some toys. And their concerns are completely warranted. This year, there were already nearly 60 separate toy recalls before the beginning of November. In 2007, there were about 75 toy recalls—an average of one recall every five days. Recalls are typically comprised of several toys, which have included dangers from lead paint to deadly magnets, chemical burns to choking—and many more. From September to October of this year, nearly 800,000 toys have been recalled. Consider these statistics:

*On average, every month a child dies from a toy injury.
*Each year, anywhere from 100,000-200,000 children 14-years-old and younger are injured by toys.
*63% of toy-related deaths are the results of swallowing and choking.
*Riding toys account for the most injuries to children each year.

I’m not encouraging everybody to get paranoid and freak out over “what if’s.” I believe that most toys are perfectly safe for your child (even if they are listed below), as long as they are used under supervision. However, when choosing toys for your children, remember to check for the following risks:

Choking Risks. Many toys come with small parts that can be easily choked on. You know your child best. If you know your child still has a tendency to put things in his/her mouth, don’t buy them a toy with small parts—regardless of what age the toy says it’s appropriate for. Also be aware of younger children in the home when buying toys with small parts for older children.

Strangulation Risks. Don’t buy toys with long cords or ropes. Even drawstrings on sweatshirts have killed children who got entangled or caught on something. Another example might be a mini-hoop basketball set, where a child’s head could get stuck in the net. These items are safe if used properly and with supervision.

Riding Toy Risks. Riding toys, including motorized and non-motorized toys, account for the most injuries to children every year. If you allow your child to have riding toys, make sure they always use the proper precautions—helmets and pads. Always monitor your children when playing on motorized toys.

Magnets Risk. Several children have died in recent years when they swallowed small magnets. When children accidentally ingest magnets, the magnets can attract inside the intestines causing infection, tissue loss and death. If you have a child younger than 8, they should not be allowed to play with toys containing small magnets.

Other tips including looking out for toys with sharp edges, like plastic swords, and toys that have loud noises. A child’s toy should not exceed 90 decibels because the child’s inner ear is still developing and is more sensitive to harm. Also be sure to inspect the ingredients in play makeup sets—some contain dangerous chemicals that can be easily ingested. Finally, make sure the instructions on the outside of the toy’s packaging match the inside instructions. Shockingly, a large number of toys have contradictory statements between their sets of instructions. For example, the outside may indicate the toy is age appropriate for children 3 and up, but the inside may recommend 6 and up. Just remember that it’s not really the government and manufacturers job to look out for your child’s best interests—it’s yours. For more information on safe toys for the holidays, please see www.keenanskidsfoundation.com.


Excerpts taken from Don Keenan’s article in www.birminghamparent.com

Everyone should know about Internet safety. The Internet is a wonderful resource for learning and fun, but it has its risks—especially for children. Why is Internet safety so important? The Internet is part of most children’s lives now. While it is a rewarding educational tool, it can expose children to sexually explicit material; sexual predators and other criminals who use the Internet to exploit children; violent and other offensive material; and other illegal activities, such as gambling or drug use.

You play the key role in your child’s safety while online. Your child needs your guidance to be safe online. When it comes to using the Internet, use the same parenting skills you use in the “real” world. The keys to Internet safety are to learn about the Internet and how it works; supervise and monitor your child’s Internet use; teach your child about Internet safety; use software and other tools to help protect your child; and know what to do if your child is exposed to a potentially dangerous situation online.

The Internet—a whole new world… It not only offers educational opportunities, but also new ways to stay in touch with people and have fun. Your child may use the Internet to:
·Find information. Your child can learn about almost anything on the Internet. Search engines help you find Web sites on different topics. A Web site may contain written material and pictures, and provide links to other related Web sites. Some Web sites give accurate information. Others do not. Anyone can create a Web site and post information—it does not necessarily have to be truthful or accurate.
·Enhance learning. The Internet can help children access information or resources that otherwise may not be available to them; work on school projects; stay in touch with teachers and classmates; develop important computer-related skills.
·Meet and talk to people. The Internet offers ways to share information with people from all over the world. Some examples are chat rooms (Web sites where people can have real-time discussions about a common interest), news groups, forums or bulletin boards (discussion groups about specific topics where people post messages for others to read and respond to) and instant messaging (similar to chatting, except it is usually between two or more people on a user’s “buddy” list—it is more private than chatting).
·Send and receive e-mail. E-mail (electronic mail) can be sent from one computer to another anywhere in the world. E-mails can include word messages, pictures, videos, sounds or other computer files. “Spam” is electronic “junk mail.”

Dangers on the Internet. The Internet can also be a risky place for children. A child may encounter:
·Sexually explicit material. It is easy for anyone to accidentally come across pornography on the Internet. Some children and teens may be curious and actively seek it out. In addition, “spam” e-mails are often about sexually related material. These e-mails often include direct links to sexually explicit sites. (Generally, sending these e-mails is not considered illegal, unless the advertiser knows the material is being sent to a child.)
·Sexual predators. The Internet has made it easier for some sexual predators to locate, contact and abuse children without being found out. Sexual predators often use chat rooms for this purpose. A sexual predator may try to gain access to a child’s phone number, address or other personal information.
·Child pornography. This is illegal, but sexual predators can use the Internet to send and receive child pornography. They may also meet children online and lure them into being subjects of child pornography.
·Violence. Children may come across material that promotes violence, including instructions on how to make bombs or other weapons, hatred aimed at people of different backgrounds, spiritual beliefs or sexual orientation, or graphic images of violence.
·Bullying. Children may be harassed or bullied by chat room members or via instant messaging. Although some chat rooms have moderators to prevent this, many do not. Also, classmates or other people can bully a child online by posting threats or negative information on a Web site or by sending hateful e-mails (and this isn’t just limited to children…parents of other children have also been known to send hate emails or post negative comments on the Internet about a child.
·Information about other offensive or illegal activities. Children may also be exposed to a variety of other offensive materials or illegal activities, such as drug use (including how to get or make illegal drugs), gambling or cults.

Internet safety starts with you! Get involved! It’s the single most important thing you can do to keep your child safe online:
·Learn about the Internet. Take a class in computers and the Internet at your local library or community center.
·Teach your child why Internet safety is important. Explain that not everything online is true, people using the Internet are not always who they say they are and some people may use the Internet to take advantage of children or for illegal activity.
·Keep the computer in a family area. This allows you to monitor your child’s Internet use. Avoid putting the computer in your child’s bedroom or other private area of your home.
·Agree to time limits. You may want to decide what times of the day your child can go online and how much time your child can spend online.
·Decide what material is off-limits. Prevent your child’s access to sites that contain material inappropriate for his or her age, such as sexual material, violent or hateful material or information about alcohol or other drugs.
·Help your child create a screen name. This is a name your child goes by when he or she is online. Screen names should never contain any identifying information, such as any part of your child’s name, address, date of birth or school name, mascot or location.
·Find out where your child has Internet access. Your child may be able to go online at school, public libraries, community centers or friends’ homes. At each of these locations, find out what safety measures exist to protect your child. For example, here at MJHS, we block inappropriate Web sites. Your child may also be able to access the Internet from his or her cell phone.
·Check your Internet history log regularly. This is a list of Web sites that have been most recently visited. It is usually available on your Internet browser (software that allows you to use the Internet) or from your Internet service provider (the company that connects you to the Internet for a monthly fee).
·Maintain trust and communication. Respect your child’s privacy as much as possible. Let your child know you will be monitoring his or her online activity because you want to make sure he or she is safe. Talk with your child about what sites or activities are off-limits and why.
·Know your child’s passwords. If your child has an e-mail account or a membership to a social network (such as MySpace or Facebook), make sure you have access to your child’s account. Let him or her know that you will be checking the accounts regularly. Check to see who is on his or her friends list (Do they actually know these people, check to see what types of bulletins your child and his or her friends post (You might be surprised at some of the extremely vulgar language and sexual propositions that are being used by adolescents), etc.

Internet safety guidelines. Discuss each of these rules with your child. You may want to post them near your computer.
·Never give out personal information such as your name, school name or the names of family or friends; address, the area you live in or school location; telephone number; password; credit card or social security number.
·Never meet face-to-face with someone you meet online, unless your parents are with you. The meeting should take place in a public area.
·Never respond to e-mail, chat or bulletin board messages that are suggestive, obscene or threatening. Tell your parents immediately. Always tell a parent or other trusted adult if you see something online that makes you scared or uncomfortable.
·Never post pictures of yourself on the Internet.
·Never download pictures from an unknown source.
·Never open e-mail from someone you don’t know.

Parental control tools. They can help you make the Internet safer for your child. Parental control tools are programs or software that help you control what your child views or participates in on the Internet. They permit you to view your child’s e-mail or reject e-mail from specific addresses; block access to material that is not appropriate for children; monitor what sites your child visits online; set time limits for being online; control access to chat rooms; prevent your child from posting or sending personal information online. Remember that although parental control tools are useful, they cannot protect your child from all the dangers he or she may encounter online. Your Internet Service Provider (ISP) and/or Web browser may provide parental control tools, as well as help with using them. You can also buy the software that filters out or blocks access to certain types of material, and that monitors or tracks your child’s Internet use. Just remember that these tools are not a substitute for supervising your child’s Internet use. You are your child’s best protection online.

Is your child at risk for online abuse? Every year, about one in five children will receive a sexual solicitation on the Internet.
·Teach your child what to do. Explain that if he or she ever receives a sexual or other unwelcome solicitation online, your child should not answer it, immediately end any contact with that person and report it to a parent or other adult right away.
·Learn the warning signs. If your child does become involved with an online sexual predator, you may notice unusual behavior. A child who is at risk may spend long hours on the Internet—especially late at night; switch off the screen monitor or change screens when you come into the room; receive odd phone calls from people you don’t know; receive gifts in the mail or have a lot of unexplained cash on hand; get upset if Internet service is cut off; withdraw from family and friends. Please note, however, that these signs may also indicate other problems.

What to do if you suspect online abuse.
·Talk with your child. Tell him or her what you have noticed. Explain that you are concerned for his or her safety. Ask your child to tell you about the situation. Never blame your child if he or she is the target of a sexual predator or has been sexually abused. It is never the child’s fault.
·Report sexual abuse or child pornography immediately. These are serious crimes. If you believe your child (or any other child) may be the target of a sexual predator or has been used in child pornography, contact both:
-your local or state law enforcement agency
-the National Center for Missing and Exploited children at www.missingkids.org/cybertip or 1-800-843-5678
·Report harassment or other serious threats. Using the Internet to harass or threaten someone is illegal. If your child is the subject of harassment, contact your local or state law enforcement agency. Also, report the incident to your ISP.

Responsible Internet use. Talk with your child about right and wrong ways to use the Internet. It’s a chance for you to discuss your values.
·Insist on Internet etiquette. Being respectful of others online is just as important as it is in everday life. Your child should always use polite language in e-mails and chat rooms. Don’t allow your child to use the Internet to say negative or hurtful things about others. Many ISP’s will terminate the accounts of people who do this.
·Help your child respect copyright laws. Unless permission is obtained from the copyright owner, it is illegal to use and share written works, music, pictures and other works of art from the Internet. In general, software is also protected by copyright laws unless it is “freeware” or “shareware.”
·Discuss other Internet laws with your child. Explain that some online activities are illegal. These include “hacking” (trying to gain access to another person’s computer), spreading computer “viruses” (files that may damage another person’s computer) and threatening or harassing others.
·Encourage your child to use proper spelling and grammar when writing e-mail, posting bulletins, or sending instant messages. Using incorrect spelling and poor grammar tends to become a habit in other areas, such as on papers for school and simply talking in everyday life.

It’s a familiar routine for moms and dads of college-bound teens. The university representative smiles and introduces himself, assuring the parents of the fine education their children will receive. Their world will be broadened, he says, and they will learn much about themselves. A few minutes later, the representative raises his eyebrows when asked about how much a four-year degree costs. Students are unlikely to finish college in that period of time, he says, adding that the average student now takes five or six years to graduate. It doesn’t have to be that way, says Sara Parker of Birmingham’s CareerCompass, LLC. Although 45% of college students take about six years to graduate, Parker says, most majors do not require that long to complete. The delay is because many students change majors repeatedly, often finishing with something they’re still not sure they want to do. In fact, more than 50% of college graduates take jobs outside their field of study. The simple truth? Most students have no idea what they want to be when they grow up.

Kids are Sheltered. Unlike a century ago, when children helped on the family farm or worked summer jobs in their small town, today’s students are separated from the working world. They don’t see their parents at work. They don’t know that professions like welding or occupational therapy exist. When asked what they want to do upon graduation, they name something they’ve seen on television or heard about from a friend. Or they major in a field in which they know they can eventually make a lot of money, if they succeed. Those sorts of career selections can be dangerous. Helping students possess their abilities, preferences and interests and matching those things with varied professions’ requirements not only saves money and effort, it also boosts a student’s self-esteem and increases the likelihood of a student selecting a profession he or she enjoys in the future.

Start Early. Counselors and educators say career education starts in preschool, when trips to the farm and fire station introduce youngsters to what people do. Career education takes on special significance by 9th grade. That’s when parents should help students begin to narrow their interests and focus on abilities. They shouldn’t rely only on school guidance for direction. When high school counselors have a 1 to 350 ratio and diverse responsibilities, there’s no way they can do this the way it needs to be done. Parents can help kids recognize and use their natural abilities to kick start their careers. Abilities are “hardwired” by the time children are 14. Teens can build skills and knowledge as they age, but the basic career building blocks—whether they’re abstract or concrete thinkers, for example—are set for life. The goal is to find things students to effortlessly and to explore how those abilities could be used in the workplace. One child might make all A’s in math, but have to work twice as hard as the child who is by nature a whiz with numbers and loves them.

Resources on the Web:
● www.bls.gov/oco
● www.jobhuntersbible.com
● www.ncda.org
● www.ja.org
● www.careeractionplan.com
● www.acareercompass.com
● www.bhamyouthfirst.org
● www.asvabprogram.com

Excerpts taken from Jean McLean’s article in www.birminghamparent.com

The Learning Channel (TLC)’s Take Home Nanny, Nanny Emma, is quickly becoming a much sought-after advisor when it comes to establishing rules and discipline in the home. Nanny Emma’s show, which debuted this summer on TLC, shows parents how to correct their problems—and their children’s problems—in a gentle, firm and loving way. Each week she works with a family to teach her unique teaching tools and disciplinary actions—tailored to suit each family and the children in them. She gets results—what every parent wants to hear! Recently Nanny Emma talked to Birmingham Parent about the top 10 mistakes many parents make with their children. “It’s hard as a parent to see it when you’re in it—it’s hard to see if something is wrong,” Emma explains. And these problems—and fixes—are universal. So Nanny Emma walks us through those top 10 mistakes—and how to fix them!

1. Lack of Discipline and Boundaries. Children have to have established boundaries early on, along with the consequences for bad behavior. A lack of consistency causes problems because children don’t know what to expect from their parents. “Start early—when you are diapering them, when they are in the high chair throwing food—they can understand at a much earlier age than many
people think,” Emma says. “Begin establishing boundaries right away, and you’ll all benefit from it.”

2. Lack of Consistency. “Children have to believe they can trust you on all levels, and you must follow through with that you say,” Emma explains. “They must understand there will be consequences to their behavior, and what the consequences will be…and the consequences need to correlate to that child in age.” Lack of consistency causes children to act out because they know their parents don’t mean what they say, and they can. This makes parents’ jobs a lot harder!

3. Labeling Children. Studies support the thought that labeling children with descriptions such as “naughty” or “bad” is simply not a good idea. It encourages that behavior. Try using a time-out method, but don’t call it a “naughty place” or “naughty chair.” You can use this method and tell them to come to talk to you when they are ready. For some children, that might be five minutes, for others it might be more. Children tend to do better with positive reinforcement when it is structured and used appropriately.

4. No Praise or Positive Reinforcement. “Some parents don’t give any praise or enough positive reinforcement for the good their children do—they concentrate on the bad,” Emma says. “Praise all the good that they do. The more your praise your child for the good, the more he’ll want to please you.”

5. Lack of a Schedule. Children thrive on routine. Whether it’s their naptime, bedtime, mealtime, etc., children (and parents) do much better with an established routine so they know what to expect and when. This take a lot of arguments out of the day.

6. Not Making Enough Time for Your Children. Nanny Emma is quick to explain she’s not after working parents with this comment. Quite the contrary, Emma says she knows many parents must work, and children come to understand that, but that they still must carve out some quality time for their children on a daily basis. “There are many ways to make time for your children when you are busy—have a proper meal time, family time, and talk about your day or your week,” she says. “Make time to play games, read stories, etc.—even 30 minutes of quality time can make a huge difference in your relationship with your children,” Emma says. Make them feel like they are a priority.

7. Allowing Disrespectful Behavbior. “This is huge,” Emma emphasizes. “Teach your children to be respectful and have manners from the very beginning…from the time they start talking, teach them to say ‘please’ and ‘thank you.’ Manners come from the parents—the children pick up what you do and say. How do you expect your children to learn how to behave if you don’t teach them?” she adds. “Parents should set the example with manners and respectful behavior—and not tolerate disrespect.”

8. Poor Nutrition / Bad Sleep Habits. This may seem like an unlikely mistake to list, but many behavior problems, particularly with young children, begin with children that are hungry or tired. Other than the obvious reasons for good and enough sleep, many of the meltdowns and inattention many children have problems with often stem from the fact that they are not sleeping or are hungry. If they are misbehaving because they are truly hungry or tired, nothing you do is going to work.

9. Not Listening to Your Child. When a child feels like she’s not being heard, it is so frustrating to her, just like it is to an adult when that happens. If a child is trying to talk to her parent and feels like she’s not being heard, she may result to throwing a tantrum because she is so frustrated about not being able to communicate. In addition, kids want to know they are important, and listening to them and what they have to say is an important part of them knowing they are valued. Have an incessant talker? Nanny Emma suggests redirecting their attention, changing the subject—or simply saying, “You’ve asked me that question several times, and I’ve answered it. You know the answer.”

10. Not Showing Love & Affection. Some parents do have trouble or don’t take the time to be physically and emotionally loving and affectionate, but this is very important. “When you are physically and verbally affectionate, it tells your child you love them, they are special and important to you,” Emma says.

Excerpts taken from Carol Muse Evans article in www.birminghamparent.com